Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

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I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

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Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I have complete contempt for traitorism

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

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I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I have genetic eyebags and smile lines, but is there any way to get rid of them naturally with some massages or face yoga?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

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I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

What pleasure do guys get by sucking female breasts?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t cotton to rapists

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

What are some important works of Marcel Proust (novelist)?

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

How do people break a narcissist man's ego?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

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I can read

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

Why do men prefer low-maintanence women?

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I have complete contempt for fakery

Do you remember one day, you put a deep smile on someone's face and made them very happy?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I actually pay taxes

I understand how hurricane paths work

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I see through liars

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t buy bullshit

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I have a reading level above third grade

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I can count

Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

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